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Another major issue for JL is not being able to go on field trips with her girls or to participate in other activities that other parents can enjoy without restriction.
“That makes my heart hurt, for my kids and for me.”ST says a comprehensive psychosexual evaluation conducted at the state’s request several months after his arrest concluded that he did not have a sexual interest in minors, nor did he show any sexually deviant tendencies.
My close friends in both programs know my entire history, and they accept that what I did is part of my past but it doesn’t define who I am today.
I also have a couple of non-recovery friends who know my full story and accept me as I am today, not as the offender that I once was. For instance, there are a few people that I really do like, but I have not shared my full background with them because I sense it would cause problems.”JL says that at times she has been rejected by friends and people she went to school with.
In my previous post to this site I presented the first portion of my three-part interview with a trio of sex offenders, one female and two male.
In the previous post we talked about their offense and the registration process.
My brother has been the most nonjudgmental and available, and although we both have very different worldviews, I’ve appreciated his willingness to talk whenever I’ve reached out to him.” He notes that his ex-wife has been his strongest supporter.
DG says, “I have been rejected by a few people because of my status as a sex offender.My father is a lawyer, so he had a much better understanding of the situation.My sister just avoids the topic altogether.” He adds, “It’s been about 15 years now, and I think I’ve finally re-earned their trust, meaning they’re no longer nervous I’ll do something that will get me arrested again. I don’t know.”JL says she has a great relationship with her mother.“In terms of connections and friendships, rejection has been the norm; without question, this is the most difficult part of living as a sex offender. Have you been rejected by anyone because you are a registered offender?Prior to my arrest, I had a thriving (albeit stressful) career, with hundreds of friends on both personal and business levels. Dating and romantic relationships can be hard for registered offenders. But I think my issues with this are more tied to my low self-esteem than anything else.
Please note: I have chosen to refer to the respondents only by their initials: DG, JL, and ST.